November 11, 2019
How To Forgive Others That Hurt You

How To Forgive Others That Hurt You

Do You Find It Difficult To Forgive Others?

I personally don’t really know how many people have a hard time forgiving others but I assume that most people have a hard time forgiving someone especially if they hurt you really bad whether it’s emotionally, physically or mentally.

I have not really been hurt physically all too much but I have defiantly had my fair share of being hurt by other people emotionally and mentally. I used to have a very hard time forgiving people in the past but ever since I learned the things that I’m about to talk about, I had a lot easier time forgiving other people.

So in this blog post, I’m going to talk about 4 ways you can forgive others that hurt you. So let’s get right into it.


1. Let Go

Letting go is one of the key things to do in order to forgive others. If you don’t let go, you will feel more resentment towards the people that hurt you and you will suffer because of it.

Trust me, holding a grudge on something that a person did in the past is way more difficult and takes more of a toll on you than to just simply let go. If you are having trouble letting go of someone, try to imagine that the person is a hot piece of coal that you are currently holding. You don’t want to hold the coal for long right? So imagine that you let go of the coal. If you do that and it worked than congrats! you let go of the person that hurt you in the past.

I used to use the drop the coal method numerous times especially in my darkest times when my so-called friends were making fun of me of liking someone that was a little younger than me. Anyway, this method does work, there are other methods out there that you can do too if this method doesn’t really work out for you.


2. Be present, Don’t Focus On The Past

When people are finding it difficult to forgive, they are usually spending a lot of time focusing on the past instead of focusing in the present moment. When you are focusing on what happened in the past, not only you are not letting go of what the person did to you in the past but you are resisting the present moment and you will feel a lot of resistance because of that.

Some things that you can do to be more present is to meditate, breathe, or shift your focus on the present moment. When you be more present in the moment, you won’t focus on the past, you won’t really feel any resistance, you won’t focus on what the person did to you, and you will overall feel more at peace with yourself.


3. Switch Your Focus

There is a saying that what you focus on grows. So if you focus on what the other person did or you focus on a certain situation that happened, then your resentment, anger, or frustration of the person or situation will grow and if it keeps growing, then you won’t really have a good time at all.

What I recommend you do is every time that you notice that you are focusing on the person that hurt you, instantly focus on something else which could be work, doing something around the house, read, watch something, or some other thing that will help you to not focus on the person that hurt you.

I honestly sometimes have trouble doing this sometimes, but I have gotten better over the past few months. I sometimes catch myself focusing about what some of my old friends did in the past which made me upset or just something negative my brother said the other day and I instantly stop thinking about those things and focus on the positives and some stuff that I wanted to get done during the day.


4. Don’t Hold Onto Resentment

Holding onto resentment is one of the best ways to make you stay miserable. Not only that holding onto resentment of what the other person did to you would make you feel negative, but it wouldn’t really affect the other person unless they feel bad about what they have done.

So you basically want to let go of any resentment that you have on the person that hurt you as soon as you can. The resentment and grudge will only grow if you don’t and if you let it grow for a long time then you will feel pretty unhappy in your life.

I know this from experience when I was holding a grudge on to something that one of my old friends did about 6 months ago at the time, it was making me miserable, and I was feeling negative and down most of the time because I resent him. I realized that I was holding a grudge and resented my old friend and I let go of the grudge and resentment that I had towards him because I realized that it was making me miserable. After I let go of the resentment, I instantly felt a lot better than I was before.


Conclusion

We all at some point or even know struggle to forgive a person that hurt us. it might be difficult at first, but I can tell you from personal experience that you will feel freer and when you do forgive others. I can say that if you do any of the things that I mentioned in this blog then you will be able to forgive people that hurt you or have an easier time forgiving others.

Do You Have Trouble Forgiving Other People? Why Do You Have Trouble Forgiving Other People? What Are Your Experiences forgiving Other people? If you like, you can comment below and I will respond to you as soon as I can.

I hope that you guys are having a wonderful day, and with that being said, peace.

10 thoughts on “How To Forgive Others That Hurt You

  1. I am extremely impressed with the insight in this post.

    Recently, the man I thought I could trust wholeheartedly, cheated on me. I have been careful about giving my heart to men as I have been cheated on before and I have also been the cheater(mostly to make sure I didn’t get hurt first)

    However, I let myself go with this man, finally. I thought I had found my soul mate. I was crushed when I found out, but it did not make me love him any less.

    I always said I would break up with him immediately if it ever happened because things could never go back to the way they were. But, what do you know, I decided to stay with him.

    I had to realize that things will never go back to how they are, but that does not mean we could not build something better and stronger.

    So, when I saw your post I had to read it.
    Sometimes it is hard to do these things when you decide to stay in a relationship with the person who hurt you. However, they are necessary and the only way we will build something better out this betrayal.

    I just hate how someone hurting you makes you feel like you are ‘less than.’ I think we need to remind ourselves that someone else’s actions are not a reflection of who we are inside.

    I still struggle with whether I am making the right decision, but all I can do is practice each of the principles you talk about in this article. I will contact you with a link to a blog I would like you to read. Your insight is invaluable and I can not wait to get your input.
    Thanks

    1. You are welcome, I’m looking forward to reading the blog. I struggle with whether I’m making the right decisions as well sometimes, but I know that not being around my old friends anymore was one of the best decisions I have made. I am a little surprised of myself of how much insight and knowledge I know for only being 17 as of 2019.

  2. Wow! It is almost like you wrote this for me. I have learned to let go and not to live in my past and it is amazing how much better I feel. You are spot on and you put your heart into it. It is unique and I am anxious to hear more from you. Nice job!

  3. This is a personally sensitive subject for me and I could relate to several points, like letting go that’s the hardest one for me, being a victim of domestic violence I have accomplished some of the methods you suggest. This is well written and very relatable. Much success to you Scott.

    1. Glad to hear that you accomplished some of the methods that I suggested. I never was a victim of domestic violence but I and my brother did fight a lot in the past. Much success to you too Kimberly.

  4. This is a very interesting post. In the past it used to be hard for me to forgive others and I sometimes held grudges, but over the years I have learned that resentment and the inability to forgive only hurts myself. It is like allowing poison to run through my veins.
    It isn’t always easy, especially if someone you love hurt you badly, but forgiving in the end liberates you.

    1. I totally agree with you, not forgiving others and holding a grudge is like allowing the poison to run through your veins. Like you said again, it isn’t always easy but when you do it frees you. Glad that you found the post interesting.

  5. I love this. It’s so easy to get caught up in our thoughts of the past. But what’s the point all you do is allow your emotions to relive that event all over again. Great stuff keep it coming everyone needs to learn how to switch off those thoughts and emotions.

    1. Glad you love it. What I realized over the past year is that a lot of people are just on autopilot and allow themselves to get caught up in the past. They allow their emotions to relive the past as you said and relive it all over again. Though one thing that I don’t think that I said in the blog is that you also attract similar situations to what you were focusing on in the past. And I agree with you, everyone else needs to learn how to switch off those thoughts and emotions that they felt in the past because if they don’t, then they basically relive the past over and over and over again.

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