Do You Have Trouble Forgiving Yourself?
People at times have trouble forgiving themselves. I used to have trouble forgiving myself for the things that I did, but once I learned the things that I’m going to talk about, I forgave myself for the things that I did in the past.
Forgiving yourself is also one of the most crucial things to do because if you don’t forgive yourself for the things that you did in the past, then your life will be very miserable and you won’t really love yourself at all.
So in this blog, I’m going to tell you how to forgive yourself so you can live a happier life.
1. Remember It’s Okay To Feel Guilty
I come to understand that every emotion serves some type of purpose, happiness tells us that everything is good in our lives and we feel like connecting to others. Guilt tells us that our actions or behaviors are not aligned with our beliefs and values that we have.
It is very important to not get guilt and shame mixed up. Guilt serves a purpose and shame does not. With guilt, you know what you did wrong and you are able to solve the situation. With shame, you feel like you are in a bottomless bit with nowhere to get out which isn’t really helpful to heal yourself.
2. Admit That You Messed Up
Everyone at some point of their lives struggles to admit when they messed up. I found that the reason that people don’t admit their mistakes because it’s a way to protect yourself from guilt and shame. It might be more comfortable not admitting that you messed up and thinking that you never do wrong, but eventually you have to admit your mistakes. Not the most exciting to do. but it is part of becoming a better version of yourself.
Honestly, I can’t really stand to be around people that don’t admit their mistakes(even though I used to be one of them). I see that people who don’t admit to their mistakes tend to be more avoidant and think that nothing is their fault because they think they are perfect.
3. Apologize To The People You May have Hurt
Most likely you hurt some people along the way. One of the few ways to do this correctly is to admit your fault. Make sure that you listen to the person and be open to whatever they have to say. Make sure that you don’t pressure them to forgive you because if you do that, more than likely the won’t forgive and it won’t make your relationship with the person any better. You should give them space if they ask for it and Remember that you can’t control when someone else forgives you as well.
4. Apologize To Yourself
One of the key things to do to forgive yourself is to apologize to yourself. You can do this by writing it out or saying it to yourself. You should say or write how you offered remorse to the people that you hurt, and how you’re going to get amends. Ask yourself what you are going to do differently next time, and then if you want, you can read what you wrote down if you are writing it out.
Be comfortable saying that you are disappointed in yourself and remember that the mistake doesn’t define who you are. Make sure you don’t backlash or put down yourself. Instead, give yourself or practice compassion. Which is coaching and soothing yourself as you would with the best friend or your favorite family member.
5. Learn From Your Mistake
There is no point in feeling guilty if it doesn’t change how you respond in the future. Ask yourself a question, why did the action that I took felt okay to do at that moment. When you ask those questions, you might realize that they have a lesson behind them and you can learn from them. Carrying guilt for too long defiantly has some not so pleasing effects. It can break relationships and even alter our perception of ourselves and can decrease our self-confidence and mental health.
So when you have the chance, forgive yourself because you don’t want to hold on to guilt for a long time because you will suffer when you do. If you have any trouble moving forward, then seek help whether it’s a therapist or someone who was in your situation before.
6. Be Patient
This is one of the hardest things to do. Whenever we feel guilty about something, we want everything to go back to normal in an instant. But you can’t rush your feelings, and you defiantly can’t rush anyone else’s emotions either.
So instead of thinking deeply on your errors. Accept that you can’t really do anything about it and stop worrying about it. The emotions will still be there the next day but it won’t be as bad and it won’t affect the rest of your day.
Learning to forgive yourself for the things you have done in the past is the key to live a happier and more awesome life. If you implement any of the things that are in this blog, then you will have an easier time forgiving yourself.
If you want, you can comment on any questions that you have, or you can comment on any of your experiences with forgiving yourself or forgiving in general.
Oh, and one more thing, If you are interested in getting a course that helps you to forgive yourself and others and help you let go, then check out my review on the Choice Of Forgiveness.
Other than that, that’s all that I have for this blog I hope that you guys are having a wonderful day. Peace.