Are you comparing yourself to other people?
A lot of people compare to themselves to other people even if they are not aware of it.
I don’t know if you know but comparing yourself to others doesn’t help you and makes you feel worse about yourself and others.
I used to compare myself to others a lot.
I always felt like I was way behind everyone else and I always was critical and negative to myself too.
That didn’t stop until I realized what I was doing was destructive and I soon stopped comparing myself to others.
It wasn’t easy and I might still be comparing myself to others but in very subtle ways.
But for the most part, I ended comparing myself.
Now, I am going to talk about signs that you are comparing yourself and how to stop it.
Now without further ado, let us begin.
Signs You Are Comparing Yourself
There are a couple of signs that you might be comparing yourself to others and they might be,
- You Dwell On The Past
- You Judge People Often
- You Judge Yourself
- Feel Bad About Yourself Looking At Someone On Social Media
Some of these signs are harder to spot right away because of how subtle they can be.
Now that you know what I am going to be touching on in this section of the blogpost I am going to talk about them in more detail.
So let us get right into it.
You Dwell On The Past
One of the very first signs that you are comparing yourself to others is when you are dwelling on the past.
People might dwell that their past was so much better than it is right now or vise Versa. You might feel like it was way easier in the past and your friends or people that you may know are having a way easier time then you are.
If you find yourself doing this, then you are lowkey comparing yourself to others.
The first thing that I want to share is that the past was not as easy as you might remember it to be.
Secondly, people or your friends probably not have it easier as well.
Everybody has their own problems that they have to deal with.
If you really want to know a way to stop dwelling on the past, then I would say just stop dwelling on the past altogether and let it be.
It is not like you can go back to the so-called past, the past does not even exist it is just a concept.
Be here in the present moment right now and feel grateful for what you have right now.
If you have trouble letting go of the past, then I would recommend clicking here to check out my blog post on it.
I honestly didn’t even realize that dwelling on the past was a sign that you are comparing yourself until I researched it.
You Judge People Often
I find it that a lot of people today judge people way too much.
People pretty often judge other people and think that they are better than other people.
This is a really obvious sign that you are comparing other people and is a weak way of building self-esteem for yourself.
And you can not judge other people if you are comparing yourself to other people because how would you judge if you can not compare?
It is a really big mistake to judge other people and you should avoid them at all times.
To solve this toxic problem, you would need to be aware that you are judging in the first place and ask why am I judging in the first place?
Once you find that answer, then simply decide to stop comparing and judging others.
So if you find yourself judging other people then stop immediately.
You Judge Yourself
You can not judge without comparing yourself to others.
It is like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, they go together pretty well.
So if you are judging yourself pretty often or at all really, then you are simply comparing yourself to other people.
This can get toxic real quick if you don’t handle it.
Often times if you are judging yourself, you have low self-esteem, you are overly critical about everything that you are doing or about to do and you regret what happened in the past and judge yourself from what happened in the past two.
I used to be this way, I was overly critical, judge myself, judged myself based on what happened in the past and so on.
I did that for a long time until about a couple of months ago when I decided to stop judging myself.
If you find it hard to stop, then I have some things that you can do that might help.
first, be okay for what happened in the past, you can not change what happened so there is no use to judge yourself from what happened in the past.
Two, stop being overly critical about yourself, nobody is perfect and everybody makes mistakes.
Three, do some inner work.
Find the core reasons of why you are judging yourself, being overly critical about yourself, and judging based on the past.
If it is a belief then let go of the belief and have a new one in place.
It might take some time but it is well worth it.
You can also check out this blog post on how to stop judging yourself if you want to learn more.
Feel Bad About Yourself Looking At Someone On Social Media
This might seem like a stretch but it might be a sing that you are comparing yourself.
If you are on social media and you look at somebody that seems like they have an awesome life and you feel bad about yourself during or after you see it, then there might be a high chance that you are comparing yourself to others.
This is because when you feel bad about yourself when looking at another person’s profile, this might mean that you feel like there life is better than yours and they seem to have a good life where your life seems worse.
First off, people on social media only really show their highlights in their life. Everybody experience highs and lows in their life.
You don’t see what happens behind the scenes either, you may never know that the person hates their life right now.
Secondly, if their life is awesome and spectacular, then they put in a lot of hard work to get the life that they want.
It is not super easy. They probably had to go through a lot of hardships and failures to get where they are at right now.
So realize that they are only showing their highlights and that they have ups and down too.
Once you do, it will be a lot easier to stop comparing yourself to other people on social media.
How To Stop Comparing Yourself
Now that you are aware of the signs that you are comparing yourself, let us talk about how to stop comparing yourself so you can live more freely.
The points that I will talk about in this part of the article and some that I personally use myself are first aware of it, be okay with your imperfections, take control, unfollow anything that triggers you into comparing yourself, and lastly only comparing to yourself instead of other people.
Now that I just briefly went over what I am going to talk about in this section, let us begin.
Be Aware Of It
Awareness is the start of being able to let go of many things.
Be aware of why you are comparing yourself to others.
Is it possible that you don’t feel worthy? Is it you don’t love yourself?
There might be a whole lot of reasons why you are comparing yourself.
The only way to know is to be aware of it.
Once you become aware of it, then find the reason why you are doing it.
Go within, and when you find the reason why, then you can change it and stop comparing it to other people.
Meditation is a good way to be aware of this because meditation allows you to calm the mind so you can spot the reason more easily.
For me, I used to compare myself to other people a lot.
I would feel bad about myself and wished I was like other people.
I was like this for a while until I started to be aware of how much of a negative impact it had on my life.
I noticed that I was comparing myself to others because I felt like I was not good enough.
I eventually ended that by feeling and telling myself that I am good enough and started to compare myself instead.
I noticed that I overall have a better mood about myself and feel better overall.
This all started from being aware of me comparing myself to other people.
Be Okay Of Your Imperfections
Most likely than not, people only show the highlights of their lives on social media.
Most of us might think that their life is like what they show on social media but the truth is they only show a sliver of what their whole life is.
Everybody has ups and downs in their lives including the people who you might think have the perfect life on social media.
And guess what, they have imperfections too.
They just don’t show it most of the time.
To accept and be okay that you have imperfections and realize that the people on social media have imperfections too.
Because everybody is not perfect, and if you try to be ultra perfect then sorry to say it too you but you are literally wasting your life by doing this.
Once you are aware and it is okay that you are imperfect, then take control or take the action on not comparing yourself to other people.
You don’t have to accept that you are imperfect to do it.
You just have to be aware that you are doing it but being okay that you are not perfect will make it easier.
I know that it might sound way easier then it is to just take control and stop comparing yourself to others but you have too.
If you are not trying to or always putting it off for some reason then when are you going to stop?
It is better to take control now, it will save you a lot of emotional energy.
Unfollow Anything That Triggers It
Another thing that you can do that might work is to unfollow or delete anything that triggers you to compare yourself.
This could be a person that you are following on social media that you compare yourself every single day or it could just be social media in general like Facebook, Instagram, and so many other ones.
Even though in my opinion this is one of the least good ways to do it I still find it good or something that you might want to do.
I have not personally done this really because I don’t really compare myself to other people on social media or use social media that often in general but this might really help someone else.
Really all you have to do is unfollow the person or people that you compare yourself with the most.
If you don’t want to do this, then really your only option is to find the reason why you are comparing yourself and start comparing only yourself.
Only Compare Yourself
Really the only person that you should compare to is yourself.
Whenever you find yourself comparing to other people, immediately compare to yourself instead.
Compare to you in the past and pay attention to all the progress that you made and how improved you are now compared to you in the past.
This will allow you to feel good or better about yourself instead of feeling shame or down about yourself.
Everybody struggles to stop comparing to other people including me.
I noticed about a couple of weeks ago that I have been comparing to where some YouTubers are at right now compared to where I am at.
I catch myself comparing to another person and I started to stop comparing myself to them by comparing to only myself.
I also accepted and realized that everybody goes through life at a different pace and it is completely okay that I am not as successful as some people right now.
We compare it to other people a lot. We sometimes don’t even realize that we are doing it.
So if you found that you have any of those sings that I mentioned before then make sure to be okay of your imperfections, take control and start comparing yourself to others.
Remember, being aware is just enough to stop comparing yourself to others once and for all.
If you want to learn even more about how you can stop comparing yourself to other people, then I highly recommend watching the video below.
The video talks about 7 mind shifts that you have to do in order to stop comparing yourself to others.
That is all I have for this blogpost.
Make sure that if you have any questions or you want to share something related to the topic then please feel free to comment it below and I will reply to you as soon as I can.
I hope that you enjoyed and got some value out of this blogpost.
Have a wonderful day,